Alcoholics Anonymous — Destroying Relationships One Step At A Time

Hello Enlightened Ones!
It was requested of me to share this letter on my blog.  This woman wants more than anything for people to know that this cult religion commonly known as AA (the 12 steps), is a controlling and manipulative place.  Unfortunately, this story is sickeningly commonplace.  Sponsors in this cult religion sabotage relationships with anyone who is not One of Us.  Here is just one sad example of this manipulation.

An Open Letter to My True Love’s Sponsor

I am angry. I have been furious for many, many months. I will try my best to maintain some professionalism. I want to communicate with you effectively. I want you to hear this. I want you to hear every word.

I am not a fan of Alcoholics Anonymous. You likely know that many people aren’t.
Unfortunately for those who need support, the organization has evolved into something evil. The philosophy is flawed, but the execution is out of control.

I am not an addict. I did many, many drugs of all types. I was lucky that I’m the type who can keep it under control, moderate, and stop when it starts to go too far. One of my siblings is an addict. Many of my friends are addicts and I have seen the tragedy first-hand.

The friends who sought help from AA were the worst tragedies. The success statistics of AA are appalling. AA is not about leading addicts to a healthy lifestyle. It’s about isolating and controlling members, making them dependent, and keeping the numbers high. Not too hard to make an addict dependent, is it? The more they fall off the wagon, the more they keep coming back.

I was harshly abused throughout childhood. As a result, I have the control issues that are so common among abuse survivors. Many AA members come from similar backgrounds. Serious problems arise when those with control issues become sponsors – trusted authority figures with deep emotional problems and a desperate need to control.

There is no leadership, no chain of command, to step in to regulate this flawed organizational structure.

There are stories everywhere about sober spouses who encouraged their addict partners to seek out AA, out of love, in hope of getting help for their loved one. They found their 20-year marriages destroyed. AA wants to keep things incestuous and therefore sponsors encourage breakups and divorce from anyone who has a non-addict partner, in favor of a relationship with a fellow addict who can also be controlled.

AA groups are fuckfests. You lock the doors and just breed with each other like rats. Tom rolls up on a Harley, seven feet tall and green-eyed, dripping of success, and the female addicts see a path to prosperity.

I’ve known Tom for many years. The moment he divorced and sought help from AA, a predatory addict grabbed him before he could get his coat off. She spent years leeching off of him. Living in his nice home, him paying her bills, her not working. Not all addicts are pieces of shit, but this woman was a piece of shit. I’m sure she loved Tom but what she wanted was a man to support her.

Unfortunately, she is now dead. Another life lost to ineffective AA “treatment.” She choked on her own vomit. You know this woman. You know who I’m speaking of. You have met her. Close your eyes and picture this woman’s mother opening a door and seeing her daughter dead on the floor, covered in what little vomit she didn’t aspirate.

Tom gets this from women a lot. He’s successful and well-known, and he enjoys providing for his loved ones. I am also successful and therefore a provider is not something I need or seek. I admire that he provides well for his children and that he provided for his wife and kids for over 20 years. He is accustomed to that. I am not. It is a sticking point – Tom wants to provide for me but I resist, because I would love him no less if he were a part-time janitor. Being a good provider is part of his identity and he wants a woman who needs that.

Many sponsors are unfit for this role. You are one of them.

Tom told me your opinions of our relationship. Then he told me your demands of our relationship. Then he told me of the actions you took to force our relationship to end, as you commanded. It made you nuts that someone refused to act on the orders you issued. Tom doesn’t respond well to controlling behavior and he was not happy with your need for power over him.

Let me explain something, which you should feel free to verify with Tom. I am very intelligent. Frighteningly so. Tom is one of the most intelligent people I have ever met. I’m smarter than Tom. I’m smarter than you.

Due to a difference in life experience, I am more perceptive and more savvy than is Tom about certain things. Tom is more perceptive than you give him credit for, though. Know that.

The result, in your case, is that I knew what you were up to. Not only did I recognize your motives and actions when you first implemented your plan, I knew what you were doing about three days before you knew it. Maybe Tom is willing to give you more detail and a timeline. I’ll just hit the highlights.

When your demands of him didn’t work, you and your 5th/6th/12th wife took him to your church for “worship and support.” This was the moment my pain started.

Because I knew.

Let me tell you about church. I grew up in a strongly religious home. I attended church 4 or 5 days a week for my entire childhood. Many of my relatives are members of the clergy. My brother is a member of the clergy. I know church.

We were taught, as teenagers, about morals and ethics and faith. About adhering to the teachings of the church. Why those teachings were important. I remained a virgin well into adulthood.

Church was a huge part of my life. I have good memories. It shaped who I am. I know many authentic, devout, good people who were active in the church. I also met many hypocrites. It’s a pet peeve.

That’s why I was repulsed to find that every Adult Singles group, in all of the many churches I attended, was constantly on the verge of becoming an orgy. Ten percent of the attendees were there for friendship and faith. Few were there seeking a marital partner. Almost all of them were unapologetically there for sex. My poor brother, while in seminary, had to flee these singles groups after trying several, because aggressive women were demanding sex of him while he was trying to be celibate in accordance with his faith.

I understood that when you and your latest wife took Tom to church, you were using a tactic that started at the dawn of human history. You were controlling him by dangling pussy in front of him.

And pussy is what he got. He went to church every Sunday and immediately after, he got the pussy. He fucked it, he licked it, he finger banged it, he gave it multiple orgasms, then he fucked it again.

You and Jesus must be so proud.

I have known for months and months what was going on. I try to be dignified. I am not a controlling, suspicious, possessive girlfriend. I regret that. I should have come to SC the moment you took him to church and stopped this shit cold. I should have stopped you.

You used that woman. You walked him up to her and said “Please meet my tall, handsome, successful friend Tom.” You did that knowing that he was in a relationship with me. Did you think he could just instantly forget me, a woman he describes as the love of his life, just because he was getting sex elsewhere?

I hope to meet you someday. I need you to see that I am a real person. I want you to know that I am successful, ambitious, sharp as a tack, educated, well-spoken – one of the few people who can speak to Tom on his level.

I want you to see how beautiful I am. How graceful I am. How I own every room I enter. How good I look on his arm. What a stunning couple we are. I am everything he wants. He is everything to me.

Tom bears responsibility for what happened with her. He admits to that. He admits his role in all of this. He and I have had that discussion.

But you, in your quest to control Tom and in your incomprehensible crusade to destroy ME, had no ethical problem involving an innocent third party. You added her to your list of victims.

I can only assume she was in love with Tom. Who wouldn’t be? You apparently loathe me, but you knew this woman; you had a personal relationship with her. You walked her into this fucked up situation. Perhaps you are so impressed with yourself that you thought it would work out the way you dreamed.

Instead, you not only caused deep pain to me and to Tom, but also to this woman you call your friend.

I hate the idea of her. I hate the mental images that make me ill every day. I hate the face I’ve put on this woman having sex with the man I want to be with for the rest of my life. But I can’t hate her.

She wasn’t predatory. The predator is you. She was in the dark. Another dispensable pawn for your chess game. She’s more innocent than I am – I knew what was happening and failed to stop it. She didn’t know she needed to stop and walk away.

Tom and I were, and still are, very much in love. You can’t be blamed for the unnecessarily hurtful, horrific, cruel manner in which he finally admitted all this to me, after many arguments based on my scarily-accurate and detailed suspicions.

Your actions, your words, your bullying, your need for control and power, led directly to the many fifths of bourbon Tom has consumed in the last few days. So drunk he can barely talk, because he has lost my trust and caused me unbearable pain from which I may never heal. Because you needed to feel the power of him bending to your will.

Nice work.

Three of us have lost much. Even though we’ve all lost, I want you to know that you haven’t won. You did not win. Know this. Let it eat you from the inside out.

— She wishes to remain anonymous out of fear of retribution from these steppers.


Super Bowl XLIX – 2015 — Insights From The Chef — BULLIES ON THE FIELD

You can be PROUD to be American.

Well, what a game!  Sometimes the Super Bowl is a blow out due to a team getting lucky in one playoff game.  There are many reasons why the big game ends up not being even close to the best of the year.  We all know this and look forward to the years when the Superbowl is an even match, where we are kept riding the game until the last moment.  Tonight our hopes were realized.  This one was a great game!

The American Superbowl is a national holiday.  We make special foods.  We get together with friends and family. Go to annual parties or throw one ourselves. We have pride in our country and our national sport.  Kids are all over the place playing football.  It’s almost like another 4th of July.  We barbecue and use it as an excuse to drink and eat a bit too much. American Football is a video game we all play together for one day, and we Americans love our video games!

We also love a good story of a local American man making a difference in our favorite pastime for his family.  Chris Matthews of Kentucky going from working 2 jobs (Foot Locker and a security guard somewhere), to the instant, unknown hero of the big game … now that’s a good American hero story.

We love a hero’s journey.  It’s one day, like the 4th, when we can be proud to be American.

This Superbowl was one for the books.  Too many to count AMAZING plays, calls, ‘did-you-just-fucking-see-that‘ moments in this one.  It was so much fun to watch.

That is, until the last 2 plays when the Seahawks decided to start a brawl and the Patriots joined right in.  When I read about a soccer (the original football) field brawl in Ireland or the like, it is usually the fans who get into some shit with each other.

Tonight these ‘players-gangsters-thugs’ decided to make complete asses of themselves at the end of the game.  They suddenly turned into street-dogs, pushing, punching and throwing each other around.  Hey, FUCK YOU.

I can’t believe I got up early and made special food for these BULLIES.  I can’t believe I made a special trip to the (packed!) market for this day, fighting the crowds, the traffic.  I can’t believe I bothered to schedule my day around this group of abusive thugs and their show.  I also can’t believe there were so many of them involved in this fight.  How embarrassing.

What amazes me most is the fact that these men are such big pieces of shit posing as heroes.  Really?  You can’t take winning or losing like a man.  Really?  You can’t just walk away from a bully.  Really?  You’re grown men with an incredible amount of money for playing a game you love, and you can’t seem to celebrate and allow the winning team to revel in their victory.  Just because someone starts some shit does not mean you have to join them in their abuse.  What the fuck is wrong with these men?  There is just no excuse for what happened at the end of this game.  I am disgusted.  What a bunch of thugs and bullies.

I am pissed.  Never again will I get up early on a Sunday and start cooking for this national pastime holiday.  They are not worth it.  Never again will I tune into this show.  Never again will I go out of my way for a game filled with nothing but street thugs.  It’s one thing for a couple of dogs to get into a fight.  You’re grown, thinking adult human men!!  What the fuck is wrong with you?!

If this is the role modeling for the next generation of athletes, we are in deeper shit than I imagined … and I imagine some pretty deep shit.  We are drowning in it.

Back to the norm — Embarrassed to be an American.  At least it’s a familiar feeling.  Fucking thugs.  Thanks for nothin.

Happy Superbowl Day.

PS.  If you find yourself excusing or justifying this travesty at the end of the game. that’s okay.  I reject it soundly. Just the fact that we try to rationalize it is enough to declare it a sham.

I declare that we can rationalize it all we want but that in no way changes the facts.  They are a bunch of street thugs and bullies and there is no justification for what just went down.  We may be desensitized to violence but this is far more than that.  If I had a son, I would fear for his future.

Oh but, Happy Superbowl Day.  Twill be my last.  How depressing.  Like a craps game that has lost it’s hot thrower, I am out.  Tip the dealer for the ride but that table is spent.

— Laura Tompkins


President Barack Obama Is Out Of Fucks

A quick share from a kindred spirit.  After the State Of The Union address last night, we the people now know … the leader of the free world is plum out of fucks.  Enjoy and Happy New Year!


— Laura Tompkins


I Have Had Enough — Have You? Stay Away From The ‘Program’ AA.

The Small Book — by Jack Trimpey.

Are you convinced that you have a drinking problem and need to abstain from alcohol but are finding it difficult?  Are you sick and tired of being sick and tired?  How many times are you going to make the promise of change to yourself only to break that promise?  Have you had enough?  Is this AA cult religion ‘program’ doing you more harm than good?  Yes?
That is because AA is designed to keep you dependent on IT, rather than on YOU.

Not everyone needs to abstain from alcohol forever.  You know if you are best in abstinence or moderation. Sometimes, the choice changes from one to the other over time.  For either choice, The Small Book by Jack Trimpey will give you insight into how your inner voice can and does sabotage your efforts … and how to change that by using it.

You CAN trust your own thinking.  You are NOT alone.  You do NOT need to attend dis-empowering, mind-fuck, thought-stopping religious meetings for the rest of your life.  You have all the power to keep your promises to yourself and to those you love.  Start here.

The following is an example from a man who used The Small Book to help him finally find his freedom.  With permission, I share it with you.  Enjoy!  (And please, if you appreciate this, share it on facebook and wherever you share on social media.  I have had a hacking abuse situation and am no longer a member of facebook.  Thank you!)

“I found my way to a dead chat-room with a single person in it… “Sunflowerx41” I think it was…

Gunthar2000: Hello.
Sunflowerx41: Hello.

Gunthar2000: Are you in recovery?
Sunflowerx41: 10 years.

Gunthar2000: I can’t seem to get it right.
Sunflowerx41: Get what right?

Gunthar2000: The program.
Sunflowerx41: Ahhh… The program… Have you tried anything else?

Gunthar2000: I tried quitting on my own, but it never works. My whole life is a mess.
Sunflowerx41: Do you read books?

Gunthar2000: Yes I do. My favorite book is The Grapes of Wrath. I like to read stuff from that period. Steinbeck is a genius! Have you read it?
Sunflowerx41: Read The Small Book by Jack Trimpey.

Gunthar2000: What’s it about? Someone online suggested that I should read The Greatest Salesman in the World by Og Mandino. I read it, but it was too mooshy-gooshy for me. Have you read it?
Sunflowerx41: Are you drinking right now?

Gunthar2000: I’m at the library… I’m drunk, if that’s what you’re asking.
Sunflowerx41: Do you have a piece of paper?

Gunthar2000: Hold on a sec.
Gunthar2000: Got it.

Sunflowerx41: Write this down.
Sunflowerx41: The Small Book by Jack Trimpey.
Gunthar2000: Okay… What’s it like?

Sunflowerx41: It’s about quitting drinking… Have you had enough?
Gunthar2000: Yup… My life is all fucked up.

Sunflowerx41: Then read the book. It changed my life. I’ve been sober for 10 years in May. Hey listen… I have to go. The brood is acting up. I was just like you. You can quit drinking if you want to… just get that book and read it. Write it down and put it in your pocket in case you forget. I have to go. Good luck.

Gunthar2000: Thanks. What’s it about?

Sunflowerx41: I have to go.

Sunflowerx41: Bye.

Gunthar2000: Bye.

It would be another three or four years before I’d finally put the bottle down, but that day… that encounter in a chat-room… and that book have changed my life for the better.

A Vision for Me

I’m not gonna get into the specifics about how I quit drinking, because frankly, I don’t think you should give a shit. I can sum it up in two words… “Individualized Recovery.” That means my recovery is based on my needs, and nobody else’s. What I did to stop drinking is as likely to help you stop drinking as it is likely my shoes will fit comfortably on your feet… and the same goes for AA’s 12 steps.

I don’t know about you, but in my case, Bill Wilson’s shoes hurt the hell out of my feet and gave me blisters. It was like trying to walk with bear-traps on my ankles.

My point here is that there is no single method that works for everyone. We are all unique people, with unique challenges, and unique needs. Recovery depends on your ability to identify your own issues and solve your own problems. I’m not suggesting that you shouldn’t use every available resource to help you identify your problems and recover from alcoholism. I’m saying that when AA hands you a plate full of shit and tells you that you have to eat it if you want to recover, it’s okay to say, “That ain’t my plate full of shit, and those ain’t my problems.”

If there were any steps involved at all in my recovery, leaving AA was the first. And so, I left AA and I recovered from my battle with booze. I was able to do this, in large part, due to that chance encounter, in that empty chat-room long ago.

Half Steps

Leaving AA was not easy for me. I’d spent the better part of 16 years or so bouncing in and out of dirty church basements looking for an answer. Although I couldn’t call anyone at AA a close friend, besides my family and a fleeting romance here and there, AA members were the only acquaintances that I had. When I told my AA friends that I was thinking about seeking outside help they quickly assured me that I would drink again. And so, I tossed around in the surf. Alcoholics Anonymous had become a mind fuck that ebbed and broke like crescent waves through my entire existence. Without those people, I couldn’t even figure out who the fuck I was. They had defined me, and I had depended on their approval in order to justify myself. The only way to be accepted was to subscribe to the doctrine. They had prescribed a one size fit’s all personality profile and told me that if I didn’t find a way to fit it I would die.

And here was this book… this little rant that introduced me to the idea that it was okay to think for myself again. I devoured that book like God eats lobster, and when I was finished, I knew that something big had happened. It felt like stepping back into my-self. Somewhere along the line I had renounced myself. I had taken up Bill Wilson’s cross and followed Alcoholics Anonymous out into the wilderness and there I found no manna to sustain. And so I left the tribe and there along my path stood a sign that read, “This Way to You.”

If I hadn’t found the answer to my drinking problem, I was sure of one thing. Alcoholics Anonymous was not helping me… it was hurting me.

“But what about those nice people… the ones who’ve devoted so much time to trying to help you?”… I asked myself.
“Surely Jack and Mary, Dave and Roy meant you no harm.”
“You were the one who failed, not them.”

And I went back, and I went back again seeking their approval… trying my best to “take what I needed and leave the rest.”

It took a while, but the truth did finally sink in… There is no “take what you need and leave the rest.” AA is all or nothing. You are either in AA, or you are out of AA… There is no in between. There is no splicing the doctrine. There is no yourself.

I left AA in early September of 2006.

September 22nd, I put the bottle down.

I haven’t had a drop since.”
—  Gunthar

Thank you again to Donald for permission to share this.  “I devoured that book like God eats lobster.”  My favorite line.  Genius!

— Laura Tompkins


Selma — The Insane Reasons Behind The Paraphrasing MLK Speeches

I have a dream.  Great films change our lives.  Films remind us of events from our past that still affect us today.  Films bring us back to childhood, help us to realize how long-held beliefs about ourselves and our world are serving us, or how these beliefs may be blocking our way to goals and dreams.  Films enlighten us.  Films, at the very least, allow us to have emotions and feelings that we may otherwise be too busy, (or incapable of expressing), with our lives … to allow for ourselves in the dark safety of a theatre or our living room.  Of course, the power of film may be short-lived but deep in our consciousness, we have the experience of a great film forever with us.  “Oh Captain, my captain.”

Cable TV has also become similar in this respect to films due to the excellent work being produced.  If you have gotten into Downton Abbey, Game of Thrones, Boardwalk Empire or Shameless, to name just a few, you know the joy from these series’ and the stories they tell.  We talk about the characters like we know them.  We sit down with our loved ones and share the experience of viewing the shows. They, like films, are events for us that we take with us.  I don’t know about you but me and my man are still mourning the loss of Newsroom.

Many people like to criticize Aaron Sorkin for being too ‘preachy.’  Errrrr, no.  Sorkin is pure genius.  He does not need the politics of a cable network to express his vision of our world.  Newsroom was nothing short of epic storytelling that ended up being too much of a political mess with which to deal.  I don’t blame him for walking away.  I will still always miss what could have, and should have been, in Newsroom.

The politics of the ‘biz’ are fierce and nasty.  Sorkin has better fish to fry with a biopic film based on the incredibly revealing Walter Isaacson biography about the late, great, mad genius Steve Jobs — book entitled simply Jobs.  They have cast Michael Fassbender as Jobs (brilliant choice), and I am so looking forward to this film.  You see, Sorkin may be difficult for some people to understand.  Sorkin may be demanding and unwilling to allow compromise to the powers that be to steer his work.  I blame him not.

What Aaron Sorkin is most is a genius, just like Steve Jobs.  Aaron Sorkin is also one of those rare artists who is truly deserving of the ‘above the line’ position.  It’s work like The Social Network, regarding the ongoing controversy surrounding the founders and inventors of Facebook, to the theatrical powerhouse made-to-tour comedy musical The Book of Mormon, among hundreds of other highly successful ventures that put Sorkin in this place of envy.  That is precisely the place those who criticize Sorkin as a person are in — Envy.  Personally, I admire him and would give my left tit to work with him.  Maybe even my right one as well.

I digress.  This article was born from a viewing of Selma and a discovery of why and how the actual MLK Jr. speeches were paraphrased in this particular film.  Selma is quite enjoyable and until I discovered the truth, made the assumption that the filmmakers purposely did not want to manipulate our heartstrings and wanted to make the film be truly a film rather than a documentary-type biopic.  With further research however, I discovered the ugly and disappointing truth.

The bottom line?  They did not use the actual speeches (even with the power of Harpo films backing them), because Dreamworks and Warner Brothers with Steven Spielberg, had been granted the rights to the speeches before them and, film studios are understandably conservative when it comes to copyright issues.  To top this unfortunate truth off, the MLK estate has been known to sue over copyright issues and this is more of a financial risk than the studios can take.

As you can see clearly from this short article I have linked for you here, even with fair use copyright laws, it is safer to err on the side of safety in the light of severe copyright penalties.  The laws actually make it difficult to practice freedom of expression and tie the hands of great directors like Ava DuVernay.  A damn shame.

I have a dream of better things for great stories to be told with complete (reasonable) freedom.  Perhaps the Spielberg film will be allowed these freedoms.  We can only hope. (I just pray that Spielberg can resist his common temptation of making yet another film about his ‘daddy’ issues #itsnotallaboutyou).   

Here’s wishing you a safe, healthy and fun MLK holiday weekend … full of freedom of speech, expression, enlightenment and moments of memorable storytelling for you and those you love.  Oh happy day.


Also, I highly recommend the Isaacson book Jobs, especially if you plan on viewing the Sorkin film.  This book is just one great read in it’s own right.  Here’s a link for you:


— Laura Tompkins


AA Lies … Otherwise Known as ‘The Promises’

Have you ever heard the Promises of AA?  They are one of many sets of lies available to every disciple.

Below, you will find these Promises the cult religion of AA makes to each and every member.  There are thirteen which is highly humorous because although AA claims to have 12 steps, everyone who has been anywhere near this cult knows better.  There are 13 steps.  What is the 13th step you ask?  Sexual harassment and rape.  I wish I were exaggerating.  What do members do about it?  They justify and diminish and mock it and cover up for the criminal predator scumbag.  Even worse, they tell the victim to ‘find your part‘ in the rape and to forgive their rapist.

Yep.  So here you have the so-called Promises.  The promises are numbered.  The truth is below each one.  In bold.  That the majority of them claim a ‘we‘ and an ‘us‘ is a hallmark of a cult.  Enjoy and please share.

1.  If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through . . .

If you follow this dangerous cult religion and do not rock the boat or question any of the disempowering dogma, you will be required to stuff your instincts away and fake ‘amazement.’  And like it!

2.  We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.

You will be sentenced to a cult religion for the rest of your life and as long as you believe the horrible tenets of this cult, you will never be free.  Forget about happy.  You’re a fucking alcoholic!

3.  We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.

Your past was nothing but you being a selfish asshole and as long as you stay in this cult, you will never be able to let go of any regrets you may have.  Never.  Suck it up Sunshine.

4.  We will comprehend the word serenity.

You will chant Serenity!! like George Constanza’s dad in Seinfeld but chanting a word only makes one mentally disturbed in this cult of psychological violence.

5.  We will know peace.

You will never have another peaceful moment in your life but you will be able to claim and fake having peace only in meetings drinking horrible coffee, eating stale cookies and bobbing your head in agreement with seriously fucked up claims like “I am a grateful alcoholic.”  

6.  No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.

Even though you are the scum of the earth, you will find salvation ‘in the roomz‘ and ONLY in the rooms if you embellish your ‘share‘ to force yourself to become ‘one of us‘ … and bring in fresh blood to the cult.  Of course.  

7.  That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.

With or without our cult you are useless and full of nothing but self-pity.  Now your self-esteem will disappear as well.  Boo Hoo For You.  

8.  We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.

You will be a slave to AA commitments and will spread the cult dogma wherever you go.  In fact, you will be the most annoying, preachy son of a bitch at every party you attend.  Forever.  Amen.  

9.  Self-seeking will slip away.

Your selfish ass will never again be able to say no to an AA commitment and even your family will take a backseat to your AA life.  Otherwise, you die.  Sucker.

10.  Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.

You will be a walking, talking zombie for the 12 step cult.  Your brain will be useless, dead to you without the cult.  The fucking end.  

11.  Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.

You will fear and pity ‘normies‘ (i.e.. anyone who has not had your fake spiritual awakening), and you will seriously consider leaving AA a large sum of money in your will.  Your family will just have to go fuck themselves.  That is, if you ever make it out of abject poverty while you are putting money ‘in the basket’ and you can NEVER leave us.  Bitch.  

12.  We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.

You used to be a baffled, idiot and now you will forever be a baffled idiot … but with a head full of lies and hate for yourself and everyone else — without the right to feel the dreaded ‘resentment’ or any other normal, healthy feeling.  Too bad, how sad, you’re bad.

13.  We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.

You will turn your life over to the AA god (i.e.. Bill Wilson and all the old-timer gurus), and will completely give up on a satisfying life for yourself.  

There you have it. There they are along with the truth beneath the lies labelled promises.  The subterfuge is truly brilliant and terrifying.  These promises are the opposite of help.  They are abuse, as is every single aspect of AA and the 12 steps.

Happy New Year one and all.  My hope for you and those you love is a life truly free from this dangerous and horrible cult religion commonly known as AA.

— Laura Tompkins


Barry Lessin, Addiction Psychologist, Changes His “Disease Theory” Approach After 40 Years

Many clinicians who work in the addiction field must learn to offer far more than the dangerous cult religion known as the 12 steps.  If a client finds the steps helpful of course, a good clinician will not discourage their choice.  However, the opposite is not practiced with the majority of addiction specialists.  Many who see clients with addiction disorders send clients to the 12 step cult.  In fact, that is virtually all they have to offer and insist, just as this cult instructs, that without AA, the client will end up in three and ONLY three places: Jail, an Institution or Dead.  No matter how AA disciples balk at this, their literature clearly states in many manipulative ways and places, that the 12 steps are the one and only way, you have a “disease” that can never be cured but only have a “daily reprieve spiritual awakening” and you are “in denial” if you chose any alternative form of help.

However, statistics clearly show this to be not only false but severely damaging to members who trade one dependence for another — the program.

Dr. Lessin has been working with this population for almost 40 years and has now had what he calls an “Ah ha” moment, when he realized how the US “drug war” has failed people miserably and a wider public health perspective is necessary. Why?  The politics of the “drug war” the 12 step cult and it’s “all-or-nothing” dogma has damaged more than helped.  He studied the statistics to discover that about half of the people who are diagnosed, or could be diagnosed, in reality “mature out” of this behavior.  He learned that not only is abstinence not the only choice but it is often times not the best choice, especially for teens.

As you will see in the article I provide here (with permission from Dr. Lessin), he found himself astounded to learn that by age 30, most people have experienced a maturation that allows them to outgrow drug problems and the risky behavior that leads them down this path.  He found himself unable to continue providing the “disease model” as it is an outright clinician error.  He also found the psychiatric disorder known as addiction to have the highest odds of recovery, than any other disorder.  Oh really?!

Is this what we have been led to believe culturally and medically?  Absolutely not. Hell no. Not with the dangerous cult religion and the billion dollar “rehab” industry as merely a front for this cult.  No way.

Dr. Lessin now clearly sees the limitations of the “disease model” and has incorporated evidence-based help in his practice.  He sees this disorder as maladaptive learning, which therefore, can be unlearned and replaced with healthier choices.  If you can learn a coping mechanism, you can learn a different one when the one you are practicing is not working.  Not only is abstinence not the only choice, it is not the choice of most people who can and do successfully moderate their behavior..  Dr. Lessin is now providing Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Motivational Interviewing for his clients.  He no longer sees everyone who presents with a problem as potentially “diseased” and their only choice is complete cessation of substance use. He is no longer labeling the family as “diseased” and is helping the entire family learn to adapt and grow together, rather than shipping someone to a 12 step rehab that only allows the client to chase his own tail for the rest of his life.

He admits now that the “disease theory” is a label that is particularly damaging to teens and that is indisputable.

I can expand that and say unequivocally that labeling anyone, no matter their age, as an “alcoholic” or “addict” causes extreme cognitive dissonance.  This negative labeling has proven to be the cause of depression, anxiety, suicide, bingeing on drugs, vulnerability to crimes of violence and financial scams, and keeps people tied to a cult religion rather than provide them tools to make better choices and move on with their lives.  However, moving on with their lives is precisely what most people do, in spite of this cult dogma.  Sadly and chronically, for those unfortunate enough to become indoctrinated by this cult of subterfuge, the road out is a long, fear-filled, bumpy journey.  This cult religion causes people to fear their own ability to think and the deprogramming that must happen before steppers can truly move on, is extensive.

Dr. Lessin is now empowering clients and their families for the best chance at a full recovery, or in clinical terms a Full Sustained Remission.  In any 12 step group, a full sustained remission is completely impossible.  Any clinician who provides nothing but the 12 step cult religion is in serious danger of a malpractice claim and a license revocation.

Consider yourselfs warned clinicians.  I thank Dr. Lessin for his bravery and honesty.  He does not mention the 12 step cult in the article recently published in rehabs dot com and that is a smart move.  If he had, as I do here, he most certainly would have been attacked and threatened by steppers.  They are taught their program is perfect and if you fail to achieve this perfect “spiritual” sobriety, it is your fault because you are not doing it right, enough or are not being honest. Therefore, anyone who exposes the truth is a sworn enemy and must be destroyed.

No.  I completely reject that notion.  What Dr. Lessin has done with this article is highly brave and I admire him very much.  Now you can too.


— Laura Tompkins


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